When God Created Mothers

When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said. "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one."

And God said, "Have you read the specs on this order?" She has to be completely washable, but not plastic. Have 180 moveable parts...all replaceable. Run on black coffee and leftovers. Have a lap that disappears when she stands up. A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair. And six pairs of hands."

The angel shook her head slowly and said. "Six pairs of hands.... no way."

It's not the hands that are causing me problems," God remarked, "it's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have."

That's on the standard model?" asked the angel. God nodded.

One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, 'What are you kids doing in there?' when she already knows. Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn't but what she has to know, and of course the ones here in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and say. 'I understand and I love you' without so much as uttering a word."

God," said the angel touching his sleeve gently, "Get some rest tomorrow...."

I can't," said God, "I'm so close to creating something so close to myself. Already I have one who heals herself when she is sick...can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger...and can get a nine year old to stand under a shower."

The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly. "It's too soft," she sighed.

But tough!" said God excitedly. "You can imagine what this mother can do or endure."

Can it think?"

Not only can it think, but it can reason and compromise," said the Creator.

Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek.

There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told You that You were trying to put too much into this model."

It's not a leak," said the Lord, "It's a tear."

What's it for?"

It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness, and pride."

You are a genius, " said the angel.

Somberly, God said, "I didn't put it there.”

― Erma Bombeck, When God Created Mothers

You are You

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Quotes by Dr. Seuss. Hydrangea taken by joelliea at Floating Market, Lembang (August 3, 2014)

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Thor Reboot

Usually Owen liked to play with his foam hammer, the one that he got from Thor: The Dark World's promo.  He even loved to take a bite of it, if he was really hungry.

However, on this fine Sunday morning, when I placed the hammer into his box for him to play ..

Hammer! *grab*

I am THOR 1/4!

Eh .. too heavy .. heavy .. uh .. oh ..

.. he didn't seem to be able to hold it for long.

Thus, recreating scene when Thor lost his power and couldn't pick up his hammer.

When my mom - who hadn't seen Thor - saw this particular picture, she asked what Owen's doing. Was he praying or something?

I was very tempted to answer:

"Forgive me, Father, for I couldn't hold my hammer and it ended knocking my teddy bear out."

Birthday

Photo Booth Frenzy

Judging how easy and fun it was when Mat and I raided a photo booth back then, presumably I'd very much like doing it again with Owen.

Turned out, there were couple of things I failed to acknowledge beforehand:

• He was just a baby, with his ever-changing baby mood.
• Though he loved to smile upon seeing his (and my) reflection in the mirror most of the time, I couldn't say the same of him seeing his (and my) face on the monitor.
• No one else inside the booth that could help calling out for him, or cheering him up, or waving at him to trigger his laughs.
• Strange sound, like the sound of the background roller, scared the hell out of him.
• He might be claustrophobic too.
• Carrying a 10-kg baby, comforting him, getting him to look at the camera lens' direction, while trying to hold both of our poses inside the frame through time-countdown, required an expert skill. Smiling needed some power-ups.

Then Mat came knocking on the booth's door in the middle of the second session, and joined into the crowd.  By this time, Owen was already too upset.  Pretty sure if he could, he would say to the camera, "NOOO!!  You and I, END.  NOW!", and then he would smack the camera till its doom.

Well, it was fun, indeed, that we gave another visit to the booth the following week. This time, with Oma. I told Mat they could use the props available in the booth.

I waited outside and the studio staff allowed me to join her screening the photo results on the master computer. We heard noises from the booth - Mat laughing and instructing things, Owen cooing and whining, Oma talking to both of the kids. Sounded like a mini-riot in there. And when the results were appearing one by one on the computer, boy, we really had a giggling fit. 

Out of 16 shots (granted from 8 shots originally), we printed these ..

*giggling continues*

Definitely we would do it again some time, with Papa.

30 Years Ago: Email What?

There was a time,
when electronic-mails were still underground,
waiting to take over the world ..

we used these papers ..
for sending friendly messages,
for writing love letters.

They often came with matching envelopes, bookmarks, stickers ..
Some of them were so shiny, we could use it as mirrors.

Some of them were completely made of clear plastics -
we wondered if permanent markers or overhead-projector markers were needed.

Some were in funny shapes, we didn't even know how or where to write on them.
Sometimes they were too fancy ..
(I mean, seriously, how could you scribble on Hello Kitty, Little Twin Stars, My Melody or Tuxedo Sam?)

so we just bought to keep ..
or kept one set on file and traded the rest with friends -
the fastest way to build up our collection ..
and the fun way to spend time with our friends
(y'know, messing with their collections, testing our skill of persuasion)

No matter how efficient and powerful e-mails are now,
they will never look this cute and they are not collectible.

I have been keeping all these papers for almost 30 years.
All good.

Happy New Year 2014

Look Who's Here for Christmas

Abu Dhabi: Day #10 The Rival

Like Dubai, Abu Dhabi also has a place where residence can park their yachts ..

The most obvious difference, is that Abu Dhabi marina is more open and breezier without being surrounded by tall buildings.

Marina Mall

And the nearby Marina Mall. It's one of the city's landmark with its tent-like roof, one of the biggest mall in the city at 122,000 sqm of retail space.

By this time, shopping malls started to look all the same. So we went inside and took few pictures, had some snacks, and didn't buy anything.

We were the Masters of Window-Shopping.

Here's what we learned about the city, compared to Dubai:

• Abu Dhabi is the capital city of UAE, but it is second behind Dubai as the most populous city in UAE. 
• Among seven sheikdoms of UAE, Abu Dhabi is the largest geographically, occupying more than 80 percent of the UAE’s total area (26,000 square miles or 67,340 square kilometers).
• Abu Dhabi still has oil.  Lots, as in the most reserve in UAE with 92 billion barrels.  Yaaaaayyyyy!! The value of oil, gas and oil products exports in 2013 reaches up to AED 490 billion - while Dubai reserves only 4 billion barrels.  Abu Dhabi sits on approximately eight per cent of the world’s oil reserves, and has the fifth largest natural gas reserve on earth. It produces approximately 2.5 million barrels of oil each day.  Abu Dhabi is way, way richer than Dubai.
• Correction for the last sentence on the above point: Abu Dhabi emirate has the highest GDP per capita, and its 420,000 native citizens have a net worth of US$17 million dollars per head, making it the RICHEST citizenship on EARTH!!
• It is GREEN.  Pleasant to see the green environment that makes the city looks more established in old-fashioned way.  Dubai?  Dubai is beige-ish.
• Having said all the above, Abu Dhabi looks more conventional.  Can't describe why.  Perhaps it is because the city looks quite old with less spectacular things ..

.. er ..

.. I shouldn't jump into that conclusion this fast.

Less spectacular things in Abu Dhabi? What about the fact about being The Richest on Earth?  The White Mosque?  The Emirates Palace? The Ferrari World?

And the fact that when Abu Dhabi builds buildings, they build masterpieces in architecture.

Two of the most unique buildings we passed by during this trip:

ALDAR HEADQUARTERS

Because it's so awesome, it managed to turn our head 360 degrees all around and we had no time to press the camera shutter button.  This building really looks like a giant disc, or more like a giant burger.  As the first circular skyscraper built in Middle East, Aldar HQ has won a handful of architectural awards, including Best Futuristic Design (Building Exchange Conference, 2008). 

CAPITAL GATE BUILDING (ADNEC)

This is how it tilts

‘The Leaning Tower of Abu Dhabi’ leans westward at an incline of 18 degrees.  In June 2010, the Guinness World Records certified Capital Gate as the “World's furthest leaning man-made tower”, more than four times The Leaning Tower of Suurhusen (Germany) which currently sit as the world's most leaning tower that is unintentionally tilted.  And for sure it also beats The Leaning Tower of Pisa (Italy).

One noticeable landmark building:

ETIHAD TOWERS

Etihad Towers

The complex has one of the tallest buildings in Abu Dhabi. We took this picture from Emirates Palace across. (updates: The towers were used as a filming location for the 2015 film Furious 7. In the film, Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel) and Brian O'Conner (Paul Walker) steal a Lykan HyperSport and drive it through three of the towers.)

.. and the one that we have yet to see, projected to complete in 2016:

ZAYED NATIONAL MUSEUM

Located on Saadiyat Island, the architecture takes inspiration from the dynamic of flight and the feathers of a falcon, the design reflects Sheikh Zayed's love of falconry and creates an iconic symbol for the nation.

It would be totally .. totally .. o well, just look at this image ..

A day in Abu Dhabi might not be enough to explore. But I was glad we were able to cover most of its incredible attractions that certainly could rival Dubai to some extend.




.. to be continued to Day #11 Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow.

Abu Dhabi: Day #10 The Palace

We were stopped for car checking at the intimidating gate, and my sister easily said to the guard, "We are meeting someone at the lobby lounge."

That's it, and he allowed us to continue driving on the pathway for the kings and the royals, towards the even more intimidating palace-like hotel.

At the back of my head, somehow I was cautious, that we might be stopped mid-way by someone, fined for trespassing and evicted with disgrace from the premise. But maybe because the area was too huge, our car barely made a scene there and could safely arrive at the parking area.

There goes a universal guide telling that all guests are kings. Though we're not kings and definitely not staying in, we were visiting, thus we were guests, and it did say "all".  So we boosted up our confidence and stepped in into the lobby of Emirates Palace Hotel.

Facts (in bullet points):

• Built and owned by the Abu Dhabi government, operated by the luxury hotel group Kempinski Hotels & Resorts.
• Construction began in December 2001 and opened in 2005 with the cost of over USD 3 billions and listed as the world's second most expensive hotel.
• Architects were Wimberly Allison Tong and Goo (WATG), who are among the leading hospitality designers worldwide.  Interior design is made by KY&A.

Much to our delight, Emirates Palace Hotel was pretty friendly, not a single security approaching us and asking for our business here. We could roam and took pictures freely.

• Visitors do not have to book anything (either for room or restaurants) or pay any entrance fee to visit its 1st floor from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m.  No need to wear formal attire, as long as it is respectful to the common dress code in Abu Dhabi.

Ah. So that's why.

Being in the lobby, showered with warm lights under the towering domes and surrounding room floors, it was like immersing in a pool of liquid gold. Everything shimmered. It almost felt like we were in a golden shopping mall - UAE style.

• Traditional decor is used inside mostly in silver, 22-carat gold leaf that cover the dome of the Grand Atrium, marble with 13 different colors that reflect the colors of the desert sun, and glass mosaics. The chandeliers are made of over 1,000 Swarovski crystal. 
• There are 114 domes (including the Grand Atrium which is higher than the dome of St. Peter's Basilica in Rome) with the height of 18m, 140 elevators, 200 fountains, and the luxurious and technologically advanced Conference Centre.
• Nearly 150,000 cubic yards of finest quality marble was imported for its interiors.  
• 60 acres of interior space along with 20 restaurants, which are so huge that the hotel manager is planning to equip the staffs with golf carts to navigate around the corridors of the hotel, with jokes like 'If a maid goes to lunch, she may never make it back'.
• The hotel lobby has 26feet-tall 8,000 date palms. 

• Rated with seven stars.  Well, in hotels' world, actually there is no rating more than 5-star or 5-star with diamond.  But a "7-star" seems really fit for this kind of luxury.
• Employs around 2000 staff members from at least 50 nationalities. Booking.com even stated that this hotel speaks our language: Turkish, Filipino, Swedish, Russian, Romanian, Portuguese, Indonesian (yay!), French, Spanish, English, German and Arabic. 
• Room rate range from USD 500 up to USD 17,000 a night.
• There are 302 grand rooms in Coral, Pearl and Diamond categories with a floor area of 55 m2, and 92 suites with a floor area from 110 m2 to 165 m2 with 24-hour butler service.
• The Gulf Arab royalty has a reserved separate floor. There are six Royal Ruler suites with private car access, completely off-limit to no one other than the leaders from the Emirates. Each Ruler Suite is equipped with private cinema, private library, gold and marble staircase, spa bath, gold leaf vanity sinks, boardroom, hair salon, and rotating canopy bed.
• The hotel is also the official guest place of Abu Dhabi's government with 22 three-bedroom suites capable of hosting for each heads of state and their entourages.
• Spending few thousand dollars for a room will give us some trendy and unique treatment. For example, your tub can be filled with champagne (!!!!! and more !!!!!), which is on the list of the bath menu.  
• Caviar Bar at the lobby is popular because of its world class champagne menu and caviar selections with live traditional music. They serve the extremely rare albino caviar (a.k.a. white caviar, the eggs harvested from albino sturgeon), with just 6kg available each year worldwide, costing £30,000 per kilo.  



Emirates Palace Cappuccino

• Le Café offers a sumptuous high tea, camel burgers, or cappuccino with flakes of edible 24 carat gold (!!!).  If I had that cappuccino, I would scrap off the flakes for keepsake (or maybe I would have them planted in one of my teeth; sipping the flakes directly from the cup might just do it)

And at this special time of the year, with a beautiful Christmas tree and cute snowmen ..

• In December 2010, Emirates Palace Hotel launched what they claimed to be the world's most expensive Christmas tree, valued more than USD 11 millions.  The 13m fake tree was decorated with silver and gold bows, ball-shaped ornaments and small white lights, and its branches were draped with jeweleries studded with 181 diamonds, pearls, emeralds, sapphires and other precious stones.

.. with jeweled Ostrich eggs on display ..

.. and the world's first Gold to go ATM.

I repeat, G-O-L-D .. in a dispensing machine. I knew UAE was notorious with cheap gold, but .. seriously??

People go to an ATM to withdraw currencies. Here, people go to withdraw solid gold in the form of  bars with pendants, engraved coins of varied weights and watches.  The gold rates are constantly updated inside the machine by a built-in computer connected to a dealer which sells gold online.

The machine has proven to produce genuine and pure quality of gold, however, looking at the landmark design on the pendants, maybe it's best kept for souvenirs.

I saw some Chinese guests (with a stack of cash in their hands), playing with the machine and left with some pendants.  I recalled my sister offered me to try to get one, it should not be more expensive than market price (well, maybe a bit more). 

No. No. No. No. No.

I loved the pendants. But, no. The 24-carat gold plated machine itself had already scared the hell out of me. (did I make any sense?)

• Has a private beach, which stretches across 1.3km, to the hotel very own marina overlooking a private natural bay.

• The colours of the building reflect the different shades of the Arabian Desert.
• 85 hectares of landscaped garden, furnished with two glorious swimming pools – one designed for adventure and one for relaxing. And they do offer golf carts for guests who want to take a trip around the massive garden.
• Across Emirates Palace, there's one of Abu Dhabi's landmark building - Etihad Towers (its Tower 2 is the tallest building in Abu Dhabi) - with another luxury hotel, Jumeirah, located within the complex.

• Offering guests a day trip to Iran in a private jet to create a Persian carpet, another to the Dead Sea in Jordan and a third to collect a pearl from the deep sea in Bahrain.

My pictures above couldn't cover this hotel, so take a closer look through this video ..

or through virtual tour here and here

The hotel's rate and cost might not be the highest in the world, but by the overall look, the hotel is super spacious - they said guests should expect to be lost in here, at least twice! - and with that kind of luxury, a "WOW" could not justify.

I would just blow a "WOOH!!!"

(echoed by more exclamation marks).

.. to be continued to Day #10 The Rival.